Thicker than Water by Ellie Roth

Author:Ellie Roth [Roth, Ellie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Ellie Roth
Published: 2024-07-28T00:00:00+00:00

Ten minutes later, JJ’s feet find solid ground in an unexpected place‍—a clearing in the middle of a forest. He stumbles the slightest bit with surprise, and Cass’s fingers tighten around his elbow, steadying him. “You okay?”

“Fine,” JJ says automatically, even though “fine” is probably the last word he would use to describe himself right now. “I just‍—I thought we were going home? Back to your safe house?”

“In a minute,” Cass says, and he lets go of JJ’s arm, turning to face him directly. His eyebrows are pulled together with concern. “But you’ve been through a lot over the past few days‍—a lot of loss, a lot of trauma. A lot of pain. So I just…” He hesitates. “Want to make sure you’re okay? And see if you need some time to decompress? Before you see Desi again?”

“I’m‍—‍”

I’m fine. JJ’s stock answer. It’s what he’s always said to his friends, to his strike team, to the Council‍—how he always responds, even when he’s falling apart at the seams.

Deflecting attention. Denying weakness.

Not letting them think any less of him than they already do.

But the words stick in his throat when he looks at Cass. There’s such clear warmth in his eyes, such honest caring. Cass doesn’t want the stock answer, doesn’t want to brush JJ off, doesn’t want to dismiss JJ’s emotions or experiences.

He really wants to know. He really wants to help.

He really, truly cares.

The last fragile chains holding JJ’s composure in place snap into pieces. Suddenly, the endless limbo of the past few days is crashing down around him, torture and sleep deprivation and adrenaline that just won’t quit, and JJ is choking on it, drowning in it‍⁠—

“JJ?” Cass’s hands fly up to frame JJ’s face, his eyes sharp and worried. “JJ, breathe.”

“Sorry,” JJ manages to croak. “I’m sorry‍—I‍⁠—‍”

He feels shaky. Lightheaded. Impulsively, he stumbles forward into Cass’s arms, his legs going weak underneath him. Cass instantly pulls him close, holding him up.

Holding him together.

“My stupid human,” Cass mumbles into his hair, the words fond and affectionate. “You have nothing to be sorry for. Just breathe, okay? Just breathe.”

So JJ does. Or he tries to, at least. Tries to breathe past the latent panic and anxiety and fear, past the grief of losing everything he knew in one fell swoop‍⁠—

Past the sickening hollowness of realizing he spent twelve years of his life upholding a cause that fell apart the moment he challenged it.

“Sorry,” he repeats uselessly. His voice comes out smaller and hoarser than he intended. “It’s just‍—it’s just a lot.”

“I know it’s a lot.” Slowly, Cass starts to sway back and forth, resting his chin on JJ’s shoulder. “But you’re not facing it alone, okay? And you don’t have to face it all right now. One step at a time, Julian.”

That’s the second time Cass has called him “Julian” in the past few minutes. JJ’s heart shivers with it. “Thanks,” he says haltingly, and he squeezes his eyes shut, trying to keep the tears at bay. “That‍—that helps.”

“Of course.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.